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Used AutoSummarize to generate a narrative based on input from "Saved By the Bell Blog":

Which, of course, rings directly to Carosi's giant cell phone. Anyway, after some friendly banter between Zack and Big L about Zack's "jerk of a boss," which somehow neither of them are able to distinguish is coming from the same room even though they're like 20 feet away from each other, Big L lets his name slip, causing Zack to shriek, "Carosi!" and immediately hang up the phone. Carosi is equally unconvinced, until Zack assures him that they're undefeated.

Oh, because that means they've never lost one, as Zack explains to the equally confused gang. Awesome--now Zack can add blackmailing his boss to his resume, too! Apparently Gary has a thing for Kelly, and so Zack wastes no time in pimping out his ex-girlfriend to nab himself a secret weapon for the volleyball game. Zack is forced to admit that the team isn't quite as great as their lofty reputation, so Carosi informs them that if they don't win the game, they'll all be fired. Disappointed with the choices, Zack reluctantly picks big Pete as Jessie moans loudly that they're doomed. I don't need to tell you that Zack sent the telegram, right? Match point!

Wow, Jessie seems surprisingly calm. In Zack's made-up world, Slater is his factory foreman, Jessie is his secretary, Lisa's his sweatshop laborer, Kelly is his trophy wife, and Belding's his chauffeur.

Said product turns out to be Buddy Bands: Even Lamer Than Friendship Bracelets! Upon seeing the commercial, Zack knows he's doomed and pleads to Mr. Tuttle that the product is too similar to their friendship bracelets. Zack, Lisa and Screech are having an emergency business meeting at the Max to try to revive the friendship-bracelet market. Screech jokes. Back at Zack's house, an exhausted Screech can do little more than flop into Zack's beanbag chair and pant, so Zack informs Lisa that she'll be taking over the role of "Friend" the next day. Buddy Bands immediately. Anyway, Zack gives Belding a Buddy Band, spreading on the bullshit pretty thick. Lame!

-gil